Tag Archives: Faith

Fingerprints

10 Jan

It is hard to believe that we are already 10 days into the New Year! I hope and pray that all of you had a wonderful holiday season and an amazing New Year celebration. This year is already off to a busy start for me and I have so many new and exciting things to be thankful for.

A few years ago, I was introduced to a friend who God has used to ignite a love for the art of makeup within me. She is an amazing makeup artist  here in the San Diego area and I have learned so much from her. After many long talks with my mother-in-law, about what I want to do in life and how I was going to move forward as the babies get older, I decided to start looking into make-up artistry schools. After doing research, making phone calls and even talking with others, I found Bellus Academy. I made an appointment to meet with the school director and within minutes, I knew this was the school I wanted to attend.

I went home and talked it over with both my mother in law and my husband. They both could see that I really wanted this and told me that I needed to pursue this. I decided to really pray about it and weigh out all my options. Although the school is only 6 weeks long, for a mom with babies at home and teenagers in middle school, I began to worry about the timing of this all and if I could manage it all while trying to study and learn all I can. After much thought, it came down to this… If not now… WHEN?  So, with that, I called the school and made another appointment; this time with admissions.

At the same time I was making the decision regarding school and my future career path, I was asked by the leader of my Bible study at church, to co-lead a group with her starting the middle of January. Of course, school starts on the 21, just days after the study resumes from Christmas break. I once again found myself in a place of prayer and wanting to make the right decision not only for myself, but my family as well. This was also something I have been wanting to do and was honored to even be considered for such an important role. Although I was very excited about all these things, my heart kept going back to one VERY important role in my life…  The role of…MOM.

For me, school and co-leading a Bible study at a church I love, are both a dream come true, but so is being a Mom to these 4 wonderful girls God has so graciously loaned me. I remember thinking, when I was told I was having another set of twins, that God had to be kidding me. What was he thinking? I knew that he had a sense of humor, but this really took the cake. I was far to old to be starting all over with not one, but two babies… and I was out of practice FOR SURE. At that time, I was unable to see the “bigger” picture and although I saw God’s “fingerprints,” it was not until recently that I saw his “hand print.”

Wether I am going back to school, leading women grow in their personal faith or simply sitting on the floor playing with my girls, God’s fingerprints are all over my life right now. I am able to pursue my personal goals, but still pursue my daughters and be home with them, which is a far bigger pursuit than any of the others.  I am realizing more and more, to seek the “fingerprints” of God rather than the entire hand print. In His time, the hand print will be revealed, but you wont be able to notice the hand print without  seeing the fingerprints first.

Many Blessings ~ Summer

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I’m Not Waving; I’m Drowning

20 Sep

“I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.”

These are the words of a British Poet named Stevie Smith. Her most famous poem lent its title to a collection she published in 1957, simply tilted “Not Waving but Drowning.”

Her brief, twelve-line poem pictures a dying man thrashing about in the surf, gesturing wildly, yet unable to attract the help of people passing by on the shore. The passersby see him, but they think he is waving. Some walk on, and some even wave back… leaving him to drown.

Have you ever been there in your life? I sure have and more than once. I recall a very specific time where my arms were flailing all around and people would nod and wave because that is what they thought they saw me doing, little did they know, I was not waving; I was drowning and about to go completely under.

The funny thing is that a wave does not always mean that someone is saying,”Hello” sometimes it means they are saying,”Help.”This was my reality when my entire world was crumbling right before my eyes. All the things that I thought had value or gave me value, had disappeared and I was left with a brokenness that made every part of my being ache.

I don’t think people knew how bad off I was. I think that I had become so good at wearing “masks” to cover the “real” me, that when I wanted someone to see my wave as a cry for help, they saw a hello.

But, God saw me. He saw me struggling to keep my head above the water. He saw the turmoil in the very pit of my soul. He saw the pain, emptiness and very deep-rooted wounds that had created such brokenness.

In this book, the author talks about a gift that her son gave her one year for her birthday. He saw an advertisement in a magazine for a stepping stone kit. In the magazine they showed a picture of the finished product and it was beautiful. The boy was very disappointed when the kit arrived and inside was, as he described, “A box of broken things.” His father had to explain to him that he would use the pieces to create his own pattern and make a unique, one-of-a-kind gift for his mom. Once he understood this, he went to work, and she said that stepping stone was perfect. All the pieces were arranged in the very order he had placed them, and what she loved most was that he had scribbled in the concrete, “I love you, Mom” with his finger. That special stepping stone is in her back yard and every morning when she goes outside to drink her coffee, she sees that stone… that gift, that means so much to her, but was once just “a box of broken things.”

I believe that God sees our brokenness… but also sees the final product, what only HE can make from that it. When we come to him in pieces, lost and needing to be “repaired,” He gets to work. He begins to strategically place all the pieces of our brokenness and make something that becomes a unique, one-of-a-kind masterpiece.

I love Isaiah 43:19, which says:

See, I am doing a new thing!

Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.

So many times we feel like we are going to drown but that is because we are too busy looking behind us, and not ahead. We let our past become the focus of our future. You cannot drive a car if you are looking in the rearview mirror. You have to look through the windshield, and I truly believe there is a reason the windshield is MUCH bigger than the rearview mirror. That mirror has been strategically placed over the windshield so our eyes can catch a glance of what is behind us, before we return our gaze on what is ahead of us.

I am so thankful for the redemption I found in the cross. Without the cross, and what Jesus did on it, I am a HOT MESS. I believe with all that I am, God is asking us to leave everything behind, and follow Him, because he has something brand-new in store of each of us, just as he promised in Isaiah. He knows if we are waving “Hello” or “Help.”

So in closing, I pray that if look at the state of your life right now as “a box of broken things,” that you will make a decision to not let it stay that way. I am so glad that I finally gave up and surrendered everything to the Lord. I allowed Him to grab my hand, and drag me to the shore.

I am looking forward to Chapter 2… The title alone already has me excited and I pray that each of these entries will encourage you, just as they are me!

So, until tomorrow… Many Blessings~ Summer

God loves broken people (and those who pretend they’re not)

19 Sep

Yesterday was the kick off for the fall session of “Women of Faith,”  which is a women’s Bible study group at my church.

Last week, after not really being sure which study I wanted to do, I ended up choosing,“God loves broken people. (And those who pretend they’re not.) I think it was the title that caught my attention, but it was the description of the book and study that kept it.

If there is one word I use to describe my past, it is BROKEN.

Many of you reading this know my story, but for those of you who don’t, let me just say that is by God’s grace and mercy that I am here today.

As I was outside this morning, sipping on my extra strong coffee, and reading through chapter 1 of this book, I decided that I would blog as I go through this study. In the first chapter alone, I think I had 5 “Ahh haaa” moments. I can already tell that this book, is exactly what I need and I know God is going to continue to restore this once very broken life.

So, later this evening, when the babies go down for the count, I will begin writing about this journey I am on. I will go chapter by chapter and pray that God uses it to help you, no matter where you are in life, or how “unbroken” you think you are! 😉

Eeekkk, okay, I am excited. Now, time to get in “mommy” mode and feed the girls lunch!

Until tonight, have a great day!!!

Many Blessings~ Summer

If you had to give up one vice, what would it be?

22 Aug

Vice (noun)- an immoral or evil habit or practice. Synonyms: fault, failing, foible,weakness.

  If I had to give up one vice/weakness, I would give up how much I worry AND I am sure my husband would be so thankful!

I worry about everything. Our finances, the kids, my family, health issues, if I have offended someone, where my future is going and how I will get there. I worry about my husband being happy and if my kids are going to turn out okay. If there is something to worry about, then I am sure I do. But as I sit here and acknowledge this, I have to wonder why. Why do I worry so much?

Perhaps it’s because I was a single mom for a long time, living pay check to pay check praying that ends would meet. Maybe it’s because as a teenager my father walked out on our family leaving my mom to support my sister and I, and she eventually lost everything.  Maybe it is because I feel that I need to control my environment and I find security in that; OR maybe it is very simple… I don’t trust God enough. Sadly, that is the answer. I have put my faith and hope in myself and what I can control rather than in a God who is so much bigger than me.

“Matthew 6:25 says, “Don’t worry about tomorrow. After all, tomorrow will worry about itself.” Worrying robs us of today. I know this is true because there have been so many times that I have sat worrying about things that never happened, only to realize later that I wasted precious time.

So, I am setting a new goal (and Erik if you are reading this, you may find sticky notes around the house as a reminder… just a FYI) I am going to let God be God and Summer be Summer. Meaning, I am going to trust in Him more and in myself less. When I start to worry, I will remind myself of His promises and that He will take care of me and those I love. I am going to worry less, trust more and enjoy today.

Blessings, Summer~

The Value in Today

21 Aug

 

He kissed his wife and 3 month old son goodbye and headed out the door for a fishing trip with one of his friends. He has been going to the same lake in Oregon since he was a boy. He knew the in’s and out’s of that place like it was nothing.It was in an instant that everything changed and somehow on the way in, the boat he was capsized into the really cold waters leaving him and his friend to fight for their lives. Sadly, his body was consumed with hypothermia and as hard as he fought, he didn’t win. He died doing something he had done over and over again.

 

I heard this young man’s story as I was on one of my evening runs. My eyes were filled with tears because sitting at home were my babies and big girls and it got me thinking… I run this particular route almost everyday. It is a 4 mile loop around where I live and I could probably run it in my sleep. When I lace up my shoes, put on my earphones and head out to the street, I never think… “I may not come back from this run.” No, I think, “Ahhhh, 30 to 35 minutes of ME time.” I am sure that young man did not kiss his wife that day thinking it would be the last time he ever saw her face. He assumed, like we all do, I will be back soon, life will go on and I will live to see tomorrow.

Every single one of us has an invisible clock over our head. It is counting down the days that we have left here on this earth and not one of us knows then that clock will stop ticking. So, what are we doing with each moment we have here? More importantly, are we making valuable deposits into the lives of our spouse, children, family members and friends?

I am learning that it’s never to late to start. As I continued to listen to the message they spoke of his memorial service and one after one, people got up and told stories of how this ONE man had made an impact on their life. This is my hearts desire. If something was to happen to me tomorrow… I want my husband to know that he was my dream come true and since meeting him, I have become a better person. I want my 4 daughter to know that they are my treasure. I cherish them for the life they have given to this once lifeless soul. I want my mom and sister to know that there are NO words to explain my love and appreciation for putting up with me and for all the amazing memories we have. I want all my family and Erik’s family to know that they mean everything to me.

We are not guaranteed tomorrow, although most of us will wake up and have a “tomorrow” but we need to value and cherish today. We need to love the ones who love us and pray for those who don’t. Go, kiss your husband or wife and thank them for all they do for you. Tell them just how much you love them. Grab your kids, young or old, and hug them, letting them know how proud they have made you. Call your mom or dad and let them know how lucky you are to have had them as parents. If you cannot do that because they are no longer here, than simply thank God for allowing them to be in your life.

There is so much value in TODAY! Go out and find it.

Blessings ~ Summer

A letter to my sister

30 Jul

Dear Sis,

I am SO proud of you. I am proud of the woman you have become and what you are doing with your life. I am proud and humble to call you my sister and my friend.

For 3 1/2 years now, I have watched you grow in your Faith. I watched you surrender all you are to the Lord and walk in obedience despite the cost. I watched you become so strong and I have also watched all of this rub off on so many.

With grace, love and humility, you have changed lives. Not just mine, but if mine was the only life you ever changed, I know that would be enough for you. Your true love for Jesus is evident in all you do. It is evident in how you treat others. It is evident in how you lead your children and respect your husband. It is evident in the way you serve without ever needing or wanting anything in return. I know your hearts desire is to be a light in a world full of darkness.

Witnessing your baptism last night… Your public declaration to follow and serve Jesus, no matter what… was such a proud moment for me. I stood there in awe of how far you have come. When the world was offering you so much, you chose the path less traveled. You chose the road that is narrow and so very hard at times. You knew the cost, but you walked it anyway, and that has led you to a life of redemption.

I love you with all that I am and I am so thankful that God chose YOU to be my little sister. He chose us to have a bond that the strong-holds of this world cannot break. Thank you for loving me in my darkest of hours and never giving up on me. Thank you for believing in me when everyone had given up on me. Thank you for seeing something in me and knowing what I was capable of becoming. But most of all, thank you for passionately pursing Jesus and living a life that changes others.

Make Me Up Summer

Certified Makeup Artist & Airbrush Makeup Specialist

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